


The Worst of Starts

by jb_slasher



Series: The Inevitability Of It All [6]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Arsenal FC, Forgive Me, M/M, author is not fluent in German, leave a drunk message
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-20
Updated: 2006-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-02 20:54:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4073554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jb_slasher/pseuds/jb_slasher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Half a season wasted because of an injury in the first match of the season. He's had enough time to think. He's had enough time to mourn. He's had enough time to regret.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Worst of Starts

**Author's Note:**

> Written for 31_days, July 20, prompt: "But if you've known love like the jokers before."

Tomas grabs the whiskey bottle instead of the water bottle. Flips the cork, downs the fucking alcohol and fuck, it burns, _fuck_.

The classic drunk phone call he almost promised to Sebastian years ago. When he was still innocent, when he wasn't... He doesn't even know what he was. He was driven by a feeling that he still doesn't recognize.

His picture should have been in a dictionary next to the word "betrayal". He was the fucking embodiment of it.

But he's not that man anymore. He has had enough. He has been Betrayal for a long time, and now, it's over and done with. He wants to be innocent again but he knows he can never be that. He fucked up. But he can try to make up for it.

"Vergib mir."

Like he's pleading for his life. In a way, he _is_. If Sebastian only knew...

Half a season wasted because of an injury in the first match of the season. He's had enough time to think. He's had enough time to mourn. He's had enough time to regret.

Now is the time to start apologizing.

He doesn't ask Sebastian to come back to him, _nein, ich darf nicht_. He merely begs for forgiveness. Because that... _that_ he might get.

The worst time of his life. A new life in England. This? Is his worst of starts.

 

Sebastian cries while he listens to Tomas's message on his cell phone. He goes to the bathroom so Per won't notice. He doesn't.

Sebastian listens to the message three more times.

Three short sentences.

One. Asks for forgiveness.

Two. Says Tomas isn't allowed to ask him to come back to him.

Three. Three words that still manage to rip him wide open.

He thought he didn't need to heal anymore, that he was whole again. But his heart still hasn't found that missing piece. He thinks it hid in Tomas's suitcase, just for the fun of hurting Sebastian one more time by making a phone call years after disappearing on him.

Well, it hasn't lost its talent. He hurts once again. But the pain is more numb than he remembered. He's slowly recovering but still hurting.

If it's so important to Tomas, he can show forgiveness. It's been a long time. Maybe Tomas has changed. Sebastian hopes.


End file.
